Breast is Best

               Breast is best.. but for how long? I am a lactivist, a lover of boobie babies and long term nurser. I have been nursing baby for almost 20 months now with no sign of stopping. At least for him, I however have been feeling the pressures of the proverbial "Societal Norms". Three out of four moms leave the hospital breastfeeding, but by 6 months it is down to 43%  only 1/4th of babies make it to their first birthday*. Almost none make it as long as I have, so I am feeling pressures from my family and society as a whole to end my nursing journey. But I DON'T WANNA! Thankfully most of my friends a avid (some rabid :P) nursers, but even they ended around the 12-18 month mark. I feel the need to hide my nursing , no in a sick way like I am doing something wrong, I just don't want to be judged for having a 22lb toddler hanging from my boob in the middle of Target ( I am sure no one would look twice in walmart.) I love the fact that when Baby wakes up in the morning he says and signs "Mama, Boobie,Milk, Please" and the way he looks at me with his bright blue eyes. Or when he is ready for sleep and all he wants for comfort is my tender, loving bosom.

Okay, to be fair to myself.. he is kind of getting weird about the way he treats my boobs, and it is starting to make me a tinsy bit uncomfortable. A list of weird things he does to my tits that make me a little skeeved out:

1. He slaps my cleavage when he wants to be fed. Sometimes it's in public.
2. Sometimes he motorboats my ta-tas in public .
3. When he dose the aforementioned things he also says loudly (and unfortunately clearly) "BOOOBIEEESS"
4. He likes to play with the unused nipple by digging in my bra while nursing.
5. He started shaking his head "NO" while attached. 
6. He recently discovered Hot Wheels. He now uses my cleavage as hilly terrain for his "cahs".

So it is getting more than a little weird for me, but I don't think either one of us is in an emotional place to give it up. Nursing is my most favorite parts of child bearing/rearing hands down. Not to mention all of the benefits. The bond I forge with my child during this time is precious to me, and Baby is a handful. So nursing him is one of the only times during our day we aren't butting heads.

With Picky all I wanted to do was nurse him, but with a lack of support at home and being 17 in a tumultuous home environment , it was nearly impossible. I couldn't get him to latch on , so I pumped. For 6 weeks until I couldn't do it anymore ( I was put on medicine to battle my crippling post partum psychosis)

When I was pregnant with Princess I made a vow to myself to nurse as long as I could and by setting 3 month increments I made it to 14 months, where she weaned herself. Same thing with Doodle, he made it almost to 17 months before weaning himself. Now where we are, at a stalemate with baby. I am hoping he will decide to give up one day so I don't have it on my conscience. Yeah, I know that sounds horrible, but I love nursing so much I haven't had the heart to say no the 5x we have tried to wean him. So wish me luck,if Baby has his way he will be the longest breastfed human of all time, and will still be nursing on his wedding day (after that he is his wife's problem).