What Have I Been Up To?

Whoa!!! Where have I been and more importantly what have I been up to? Lets start off with.. THE KIDS HAVE BEEN HOME ALL SUMMER!!!! AHHH!!!! I have been incredibly busy with doctors appointments, vacations , friends and visiting siblings. So busy that I can't believe that the kids start school in exactly 2 weeks. Here are some photos of our summer so far.

Strawberry picking in May.

 What's this?

 Yummy!

 Let's get this family photo done so we can get out of here.

 We love when Grandpa comes to visit.

 Shrimp and Cheesy grits , perfect summer meal.

 Last day of school!

 The kids last time playing with our neighbors who moved.

 Loves his Cozy Coupe.

 Pool Party

 Doodle loves this kid.

 Picky's Birthday party.

 Brave Heart

 BFFLs

 Tie-dye

 How long have we been friends?

 Yogurt finger paint.

 Aquarium with Gogo.

Looking at the estuary with Uncle Chris. 

 Giving Gogo permission to kiss him. 

 Like a boss.

 Doodle and Aunt Toria

 I have a picture of Doodle making the same face 5 years ago.

 They rode around the resort this way.

 I love raising my crazy boys, they make it fun. (Most of the time.)

 So over her brothers.

 Side walk chalk ice-cream?

 

 So fabulous.

Throw in lots of movies, naps and theme park trips you have our summer. How have you held up so far?

Breast is Best

               Breast is best.. but for how long? I am a lactivist, a lover of boobie babies and long term nurser. I have been nursing baby for almost 20 months now with no sign of stopping. At least for him, I however have been feeling the pressures of the proverbial "Societal Norms". Three out of four moms leave the hospital breastfeeding, but by 6 months it is down to 43%  only 1/4th of babies make it to their first birthday*. Almost none make it as long as I have, so I am feeling pressures from my family and society as a whole to end my nursing journey. But I DON'T WANNA! Thankfully most of my friends a avid (some rabid :P) nursers, but even they ended around the 12-18 month mark. I feel the need to hide my nursing , no in a sick way like I am doing something wrong, I just don't want to be judged for having a 22lb toddler hanging from my boob in the middle of Target ( I am sure no one would look twice in walmart.) I love the fact that when Baby wakes up in the morning he says and signs "Mama, Boobie,Milk, Please" and the way he looks at me with his bright blue eyes. Or when he is ready for sleep and all he wants for comfort is my tender, loving bosom.

Okay, to be fair to myself.. he is kind of getting weird about the way he treats my boobs, and it is starting to make me a tinsy bit uncomfortable. A list of weird things he does to my tits that make me a little skeeved out:

1. He slaps my cleavage when he wants to be fed. Sometimes it's in public.
2. Sometimes he motorboats my ta-tas in public .
3. When he dose the aforementioned things he also says loudly (and unfortunately clearly) "BOOOBIEEESS"
4. He likes to play with the unused nipple by digging in my bra while nursing.
5. He started shaking his head "NO" while attached. 
6. He recently discovered Hot Wheels. He now uses my cleavage as hilly terrain for his "cahs".

So it is getting more than a little weird for me, but I don't think either one of us is in an emotional place to give it up. Nursing is my most favorite parts of child bearing/rearing hands down. Not to mention all of the benefits. The bond I forge with my child during this time is precious to me, and Baby is a handful. So nursing him is one of the only times during our day we aren't butting heads.

With Picky all I wanted to do was nurse him, but with a lack of support at home and being 17 in a tumultuous home environment , it was nearly impossible. I couldn't get him to latch on , so I pumped. For 6 weeks until I couldn't do it anymore ( I was put on medicine to battle my crippling post partum psychosis)

When I was pregnant with Princess I made a vow to myself to nurse as long as I could and by setting 3 month increments I made it to 14 months, where she weaned herself. Same thing with Doodle, he made it almost to 17 months before weaning himself. Now where we are, at a stalemate with baby. I am hoping he will decide to give up one day so I don't have it on my conscience. Yeah, I know that sounds horrible, but I love nursing so much I haven't had the heart to say no the 5x we have tried to wean him. So wish me luck,if Baby has his way he will be the longest breastfed human of all time, and will still be nursing on his wedding day (after that he is his wife's problem). 

 

DIY: Solar Light Jar

Ok don't get to excited, this is not a tutorial on how to make a solar powered light diode, nor is it an original idea. I am not that smart or talented. I saw a picture on Pinterest but could not find the original source, so I kind of made it up. I think the results were pretty nice, but the light I picked up was one of those blusish ones, I prefer the softer more yellow lights. So here we go... my light in a jar tutorial.

First you need to get :

A jar (must have a clear lid)

Rustolium Frosted Glass spray paint

A cheap solar powered light ( I found mine in the garden section of Target)

Hot glue or super glue

Make sure your jar is clean and dry. Mine was an old change jar that once housed peppermints from my husbands bachelor days. It still had a dirty man whore feel to it, so of course I had to spruce it up.

Then you spray paint the jar. I sprayed the inside, because if you did it on the outside you would risk chipping the paint. I would also tell you to put it on a piece of cardboard before you spray. Or else risk getting grass clippings in the wet paint. (I've done this with other projects and its a huge pain in the ass to fix) Also remember to do this in a well ventilated area. Unless you want to get high on paint fumes, if so have at it.

After the jar is dry ( I waited 24 hours) take your light fixture and remove the solar powered do-dad from the top. Adhere with glue. Be careful not to get the glue on the solar panel.

Let that dry.

Then turn it on, stick it in a sunny spot and wait till dark to enjoy!

In Stitches

What a day it has been! It started out pretty awesome, I got to drive our new electric car to drop the kids off at school , David was making me breakfast, and I was going to make it to the gym in time to make my 2 favorite classes! I was on top of it this morning, that is until I walked in the front door expecting fantasmo homemade cinnamon honey oatmeal and instead am bum rushed by David (who looked whiter then his usual pasty self).

" Hey! I don't want you to freak out... but Doodle had an accident."

"Umm.. ok...?" (what the fuck!?!?! )

" He fell...."

"Mmmhhmm...and...?"

"Down the stairs."

"Ok..." (Really? Again? Oh God his arm or leg is broken and now there is bone poking through his skin and blood ... man this kitchen floor needs to be mopped this morning. What hasn't David told me yet?)

" He is okay, but he needs to go to the hospital. Don't get upset and scream, I finally got him calmed down."

"Okay...." I go down the hall and enter the kitchen, where I see my beautiful baby boy with a fucking HOLE in his beautiful , once unmarred skull.

" Hey buddy are you O.K?"

He shook his head, okay, there isn't any brain matter (that I can see.) Breathe! I tried to stay calm, because freaking out is going to freak him out and if he freaks out his blood pressure will go up , therefore making the open wound in his head gush instead of drip blood. HOLY FUCK it looks gross! I guess moping is out of the question this morning.

"I can't look at this David. We need to cover it or I am going to pass out."

"Find a gauze."

I find one and have David apply it , I avoid looking at it. I start getting ready to go, I grab the necessary cards and my purse.

"I'm going to get the baby up and go with you, so one of us can hold the bandage on him while the other drives."

"Thats fine. Doodle what do you want to bring to the doctors? "

"Lovie and my pink Barbie."

I go upstairs and search for this weird yellow crusty, half bear half blanket my grannny bought for him when he was born. I look everywhere in the room and can't find the damn thing. UGH! Seriously?? One of the things my wounded baby wants is missing! What kind of mother am I? I grab his frog stuffed animal and the  pink Barbie and rush down to help him put on his shoes. I tell him to stand by the door, and I go to the kitchen and down a glass of wine, I need some liquid courage. Then I hear the door open and look down the hall just in time to see Doodle get hit in the head by the door!  I am now convinced he is going to die by the end of this day.

We get in the car and David drops me off by the front door, I tell him to find a sitter for Dex.

"Try C and if we can't get C call T. Her cell number is in my cell, which is in the other car."

"Got it. Good Luck buddy, the doctors are going to take care of you. I will be back soon to help you."

I go the the desk and check Doodle in. On the paperwork they ask me "Reason for visit: Hole in my sons head."  I sit down next to him in a chair , but I have to turn away so he can't see the silent tears running down my face. I am so worried, I don't think it is a life threatening thing, but I am worried about a head trauma. (Yes, I have been told by friends and family to STOP watching Grey's Anatomy) I am a mom, and anytime my kids are hurt, I hurt, because there are somethings I can't fix or take away from them. I am also crying because I am glad that it wasn't worse. When he fell he hit his forehead on the pin part of the hinge from the front door.

So while it poked a hole in his skin, it missed his eye, which it would have gone though had it been 3 inches down. 

They take us back to a room, where he lays in bed for an hour watching cartoons. They come in and out checking on him, the Doctor tells me hit is nasty but he will need 2 stitches. He leaves and the wine on my empty stomach combined with the thought of them piercing my sons flesh with a needle is enough to send me to the bathroom to hurl. AWESOME! I smell like booze/barf and my son is in here for an accident. God I hope they can't smell me otherwise they will call CPS ! Thankfully they waited until David got back to the hospital to start sewing him up. He was so good the entire wait. He even let them wrap him like a burrito so his hands wouldn't be free to grab them. I consider leaving the room, but I can't .. I have a morbid curiosity, what can I say? They numbed him up and he squirmed with discomfort but he didn't yell or scream (which I am thankful and surprised with.) It's done in no time, they give us our discharge information and we are on our way. We ask him what he wants for a special lunch, he says "SUSHI! and Cake." We oblige. I ended up crying in the restaurant, thinking " This wasn't that serious, but who knows what the future holds?How am I supposed to let four humans go into the world?" Ugh Elizabeth Stone said it best "Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." I am not holding out hope that it is going to get easier. 

* Thanks so much T for watching Baby. You were a life saver. It means so much to me that you were there for us today. 

Stove Top Chicken and Dumplings

I love Chicken and Dumplings so I am trying out different ways to make it, this was one that I tried last week. The recipe made a huge batch, like maybe 8-10 servings huge. My kids hated this because I added carrots, so after I picked them out they were digging it. I kind of winged it and made this one up myself, if it sucks when you try it , I am sorry.

1 package of frozen ready made dumplings

3 boxes of chicken stock

1 1/2 lbs boneless, skinless chicken pieces

1 bag of baby carrots 

Take one and a half boxes of chicken stock and boil chicken 15 minutes or until cooked through. 

Once cooked set the chicken on a plate to rest a few minutes then shred. I used my stand mixer with the regular paddle (? maybe? is there a "normal" attachment?)

A  friend told me of this trick. It is a HUGE time saver. I feel like I owe her a massage by a hunk of her choosing for this tip. 

In a separate pot boil carrots in remaining stock. Add salt, pepper and oregano to taste.

Once stock is boiling add the package of noodles one at a time. I broke them in half and constantly stirred so they would not clump and stick together. 

Reboil for 30-35 minutes 

Add Chicken and cook for another 5-10 minutes. 

Enjoy.

    

Fuck You Friday

(Audible sigh)

Seriously fuck Friday (May the 4th....be with you hehe)
Sometimes day start off as shit...and the shit keeps rolling, until you are just praying that you make it through the day without killing someone.

Okay, so my day wasn't that bad, I mean my family is still happy , healthy and wealthy and that's what matters.
Right? It was still a sigh worthy day, one that left David and I just wanting to crawl into bed at 9:30pm.

As most of you know, I am a lover of sleep. I am one of THOSE  moms. I don't do cheerful wake ups with a hot breakfast waiting on the table. I wish to God I was for my children's sake, but I'm not. I am more of a wake up 20 minutes before the bus comes, check over their lunches ( otherwise I will get ANOTHER note home telling me my son packed half a bagel, a fist full of cereal and a juice box.) do a run down of the chores they were supposed to fulfill and run them to the bus stop 2  min before it arrives. I've been at this 9 years and frankly I'm worn out. So I like to rest when I can.

Yesterday the kids woke up an extra 45 minutes early. That means an additional 30 minutes of time to fuck stuff up. Which is such a pain in the ass when you are tying to keep a narcissistic, cantankerous toddler asleep as long as humanly possible (or 9am , whichever comes first). This is how our morning went:

6:50 am- Princess and Picky by my bedside: "MOM!" "Mommy!"
"What?"
Princess hands me Picky's piggy bank
"Open this, please."

"Why?"

Picky " We need $2."

" I have your lunch money in Dad's wallet."

Picky "But Princess wants to buy a squinky from N ( neighbor kid from Princess' class) for $2! It's a great deal Mom! It's a very rare Power Ranger one!"

"WHAAATTT?!?! Hell no! you are not paying $2 for a toy you can get for $.25 in a vending machine, and even that is a rip off because it costs a small Cambodian child -$.05 to make it.! What time is it anyways?"
Look at cell phone...
"CHRIST!! Its not even 7 am! What are you doing up so early?"

Princess " You put us to bed early... remember?"

Last time I do that! " Go to Princess' room and play until its 7:45"

Nestle back into my pillow nest ( I need at least 6 pillows to sleep)

"MOM!!!!!"

Damn it, now what? "WHAT?"

"Doodle went into the babies room and got a toy!"

"HE DID WHAT???"

"He went into the babies room to get a toy."

"Where is he now."
From around the corner I see his shit eating grin from my nest.

"See. I gota matching toy." ( a musical necklace from McDonalds, with another one with the little mermaid on it)

"OH MY GOD! Doodle! You aren't even supposed to leave your room until AFTER the bog kids get on the bus!"

Princess " He went in Babies room and even turned the light on!"

With that I hear a faint "eeewaaaahhhhh" from down the hall.

"DAMN IT! Go back to your room and stay there until I get you out."

I go get Baby and put him in bed to nurse him , hopefully he will want to go back to sleep after this.

Nope. Fat chance, even though he is up an hour and a half early. He throws himself about the bed screaching "Momma, MOMMA! MEEEEAAAAAHHH"

I go downstairs and find David in the kitchen where is is assessing the damage.
" I am glad you didn't see this 5 minutes ago. "

"How could this have looked any worse?"

The kids apparently ate a crack cupcake and went APE SHIT! There were cereal boxes (yes plural, like one box wasn't good enough.and they thought 4 was the magic number.) all over the table and counter. cereal pieces all over the table and counter and ground into the rug, someone dumped a box of sandwich bags out in the pantry, there were condiments strewn over the counter tops.   With all the carnage and mayhem I was witnessing, David tells me it was worse??

I sit baby down in his highchair with a sippy of orange juice and some food while I help David clean up. Apparently he didn't like the sippy so he took off the lid and dumped it all over himself. Then he took the food I so lovingly prepared for him ( in the toaster) and dumps it all over the floor.
"MEEEEEE! NOOOOOOOO!!!!"
Seriously?
Thankfully it was FINALLY time to get the kids on the bus, so I ran the kids to the stop while David cleaned the mess. The baby was cranky all day and Doodle was a pill, so nap time came early. The day had more bumps than a teenage boy who only eats pizza, but we got through it. Going to bed at 9:30 pm on a Friday night didn't hurt either.




(If this is poorly edited and a bit rambly forgive me, I am fighting a nasty stress headache.)                                        


 

What I'm Loving Wednesday

Happy Wednesday Y'all!

This week seems to be dragging by for some ungodly reason. I am thinking that it is what is waiting at the end of the week that has me wishing the week would move faster, because I am pretty stoked about it. Whatever the reason, I am looking forward to everyday after today. I hope Your Wednesdays are going well. 

Here is what I'm loving this week:

1.My Family (duh!) Raising 4 kids gets hectic at times ( Moms who have more, my hats off to you.)

But there is never a dull moment in this house.

Dinner time when Daddy isn't home can get wild.

2.My Kitchen Aid mixer. I thought people were joking when they claimed their undying love and devotion for this small appliance. I was WRONG! After lovingly giving it a bath before tucking her away in her nook, I lightly kissed her. No joke, I literally kissed this machine. Once I realized what I had just done, I laughed, felt like a FREAK and then understood what the fuss was about. 

Here she is, in all her glory.

3.The band Of Monsters and Men. They are pretty freaking good. Check them out below:

Little Talks

Dirty Paws

4.My new Ikea rug. I love it , it makes me happy just looking at it and it pulls my den together.

5. The HBO show GIRLS. I have fallen in love with this show. It is pretty realistic look at 4 women in their early twenties. They are dealing with things like unplanned pregnancies, finding a job after college, emotionally un available guys, and clingy guys. They are young women trying to find out who they are in the world. It is smart, funny, and human, There will be someone you connect with if not all of them at on point ir another. I feel like I am more of a Hannah. She is chubby and awkward. She is looking for acceptance from her disrespectful lover and friends. She says the wrong thing at the wrong time. She is snarky and  sarcastic. I find I completely relate to her character, since I am ALWAYS seeming to say the wrong thing. But I have a bit of a Shoshanna in me as well. 

  

linkup here:with Jamie

Meal Planning Monday

Meal Plan for the Week of 4/30

Monday: Chicken and Dumplings.

Tuesday:  Mini English Muffin Pizzas with steamed mixed veggies.

Wednesday: Gnocchi with Marinara and steamed broccoli.   

Thursday: Crock Pot Pulled BBQ , Dill Blue Cheese Potato Salad with side salad.

Friday: Leftovers

Saturday: Spicy cheesy grits with Shrimp and a side salad

Cooking Substations

I found these floating around the internet today and thought I would pass these on. 




Cooking Substitutions:

Baking Powder (1 t.)
1) 1 t. baking soda plus 1/2 t. cream of tartar.
2) 1/4 t. baking soda plus 1/2 t. cream of tartar.
3) 1/4 t. baking soda plus 1/2 c. buttermilk (to replace 1/2 c. liquid in recipe).

Butter or Margarine (1 cup)
1) 1 1/2 c. margarine or butter powder.
2) 2/3 c. vegetable oil.
3) 1 c. shortening plus 1/2 t. salt
4) 2 sticks softened margarine plus 1/3 c. vegetable oil & 1/2 c. buttermilk. Beat until liquid is absorbed. Refrigerate.

Buttermilk
1) 1 T. vinegar (or 1 t. lemon juice or 1 3/4 t. cream of tartar) mixed in 1 c. milk.
2) 1 c. water, 1/3 c. powdered milk, 1 T. vinegar or lemon juice.
3) 1 3/4 c. dry milk in 3 c. slightly warm water (shake or beat until blended). Cover an allow to stand at room temperature until clabbered (6 - 12 hours). Refrigerate.
4) 1 c. water, 1/3 c. powdered milk, 1 T. vinegar or lemon juice. Let mixture stand in a warm place until thickened (18 hours). Stir until smooth. Refrigerate.
5) A buttermilk freeze dried culture can be purchased at a grocery or health food store, and kept indefinitely.

Chocolate (one square)
1) 3 or 4 T. cocoa plus 1/2 T. fat (butter, margarine or shortening).
2) 3 T. cocoa plus 1 T. butter.

Corn Starch (1 T.)
2 T. flour.

Cream (1 cup)
1/3 c. butter plus 2/3 c. milk.

Egg
1) Combine 1 t. unflavored gelatin with 3 T. cold water and 2 T. plus 1 t. boiling water.
2) Dissolve 1 tablespoon unflavored gelatin in 1 tablespoon cold water, then add 2 tablespoons boiling water. Beat vigorously until frothy
3) 2 egg yolks plus 1 T. water.
4) 2 T. dehydrated eggs plus 2 1/2 T. water.

Evaporated Milk
1 c. water, 2/3 c. powdered milk

Fats/Oils
Applesauce (subtract some sugar), or Beans (cooked and mashed).

Flour, White (1 cup)
1) 3/4 c. whole wheat flour.
2) 7/8 c. rice flour.
3) 1 c. corn flour.
4) 1 c. corn meal.
5) 3/4 c. buckwheat.
6) 1/2 c. barley flour.
7) 3/4 c. rye flour.

Green Pepper (1 medium)
1/4 c. dehydrated green pepper.

Half and Half (1 cup)
1) 7/8 c. milk plus 1 T. butter.
2) 1/2 c. coffee creamer and 1/2 c. milk.

Honey (1 c.)
3/4 c. sugar plus 1/4 c. liquid.

Jello (3 oz.)
1 T. plain gelatin plus 2 c. fruit juice.

Ketchup (1/2 c.)
1/2 c. tomato sauce, 2 T. sugar, 1 T. vinegar, 1/8 t. ground cloves.

Milk, Whole (1 cup)
1) 1/2 c. evaporated milk plus 1/2 c. water.
2) 1 c. reconstituted milk plus 2 T. butter.
3) 1 c. water, 1/3 c. powdered milk

Onion (1 medium)
1/4 c. dehydrated onion

Sour Cream (1 cup)
1) 1 c. milk plus 1 1/2 T. vinegar. Let stand until mixture thickens and clabbers.
2) 1 c. plain yogurt.

Sugar (1 cup)
1) 3/4 c. honey (reduce liquid by 1/4 c. or add 1/4 c. flour).
2) 1 c. molasses.
3) 1 1/2 c. carob syrup.
4) 1 1/4 c. malt syrup.
5) Corn syrup (reduce liquid). 6) Brown sugar.

Sugar, Brown
Sugar & Molasses.

Sugar, Powdered (1 cup)
1 c. sugar and 1/2 t. cornstarch. Blend in blender until powdered.

Sweetened Condensed Milk
1) 1 1/2 c. powdered milk, 3/4 c. sugar, 1/2 c. hot tap water. Place hot water in blender. With blender going, add sugar and dry milk, blend until smooth.
2) 1 c. hot water, 4 c. powdered milk, 2 c. sugar, 1/4 c. butter. Blend in blender. Can be refrigerated or frozen.
3) 1/2 c. hot water, 1 c. powdered milk, 1 c. sugar. Blend in blender. Can be refrigerated or frozen.

Tapioca (2 t.)
1 T. flour.

Tomatoes, Canned (1 cup)
1 1/3 cups cut up fresh tomatoes, simmered 10 minutes.

Tomato Juice (1 c.)
1/2 c. tomato sauce, 1/2 c. water

Whipped Topping
1) 6 T. powdered milk, 1 c. boiling water, 2 t. unflavored gelatin, 2 T. cold water, 2-4 T. sugar, 1 t. vanilla. Dissolve the milk in the cup of water and scald (boil until milk forms a skin on top). Soak the gelatin in cold water. Combine the scalded milk, dissolved gelatin and sugar. Stir and chill in the refrigerator until it jells. Then beat the mixture until it acquires the consistency of whipped cream. Add the vanilla and whip again.
2) 1 c. water, 2/3 c. powdered milk. Chill. Add 1/2 t. lemon juice. Whip. Fold in 1 T. sugar to taste.

Wine
1) Use apple or grape juice minus some sugar.
2) Use broth and lessen the salt.

Yeast (1 package)
1 T. yeast.